THANK YOU so much for all the warm thoughts and congratulations! There are a few names I don't immediately recognize on the comments. If you are following and I don't have you on my blog roll, please let me know. This community means so much to me. I'd like to keep it expanding.
By the way, anyone who thought I was messing with you because of the "April Fool" in the title of my bfp post-- the April Fool was me. While I "had a feeling" about this one, I had squelched it mostly by 13dIUI and when I saw the spotting I just assumed this one was another dud.
I am scared too be too effusive, too excited. When the nurse called to tell me, I recognized the number and realized that they would not be calling me if it were negative. We she announced I was pregnant, I said "Really?" Then asked the beta number, then I said, "Well, then. What now?"
Speedy thinks they all think I'm a sociopath. The first time they called me back in Feb to tell me I was pregnant, I was already bleeding heavily and when they told me the beta (57 @ 17dpo) I said, "I won't be for long." Sometimes my reserve/sarcasm comes off as indifference.
I had to go to the dentist yesterday and he wrote "pregnant" in my chart: it's official! But I didn't know until I was checking out, and the grumpy receptionist looked up, with startled smile and said, "You're pregnant! Congratulations!"
When I told my acupuncturist, Sara, she almost cried-- Speedy had gone the day before when we thought that there was no chance, and so when I came in, Sara asked with so much warmth and sympathy, "did you get your period?" and when I told her I got a positive beta, she flushed and her eyes teared up with excitement.
I am afraid of getting too close to this elation and joy. In a strange role reversal, Speedy has 100% embraced the present ("You are pregnant. You ARE pregnant. Right now.") while I am too worried about contingencies to fully bask in this reality.
Oh I am happy. I am very very happy. But I keep fingering the ball of doubt and fear that I keep in my pocket at all times.
If I had any symptoms to speak of it would be easier to believe. But for the most part, these seem to have disappeared. I have nothing to do but wait another week for the next beta (which I hope is
If this sticks around this is going to be a crazy year!
This weekend I promise to post those recipes. Thank you again for all your wonderful support. It really means so much to me to have this community.
If any pregnant ladies or mamas out there have recommendations for books (esp. vegetarian nutrition in pregnancy, names, and pregnancy development guides) please let me know. I'd sooner cut my own eye out than reading "What to Expect...", just so you know. And I have already wish-listed Figboiler's suggestions. I am scared to get too ahead of myself, but I am also scared not to prepare.
When do I get myself an ob/gyn? When do I start investigating birthing centers/doulas/midwives?
Congratulations again! The first few weeks can be very scary/nerve-racking, even when everything seems to be going well. I hope your next beta gives you peace of mind.
ReplyDeleteWe loved the Our Bodies, Ourselves Guide to Pregnancy and Birth. Mayo Clinic, too, I think. You will typically go to an OB at your 10th week. After your first or second ultrasound with the RE, you should start looking into OBs/midwives. We didn't have a doula, but I think that can wait a bit...others will probably be able to tell you better.
I think I can understand how you feel right now because I suspect that I will feel the same way when I'm pregnant. Pregnancy after a miscarriage is hard because of the constant reminder that it may not work. But, honey, your first beta is really good! I think this one will work!
ReplyDeleteMay I suggest "Skinny Bitch, Bun in the Oven" as a great vegitarian pregnancy resource book? It does sway more on the vegan side but if you prefer regular cheese over vegan that won't make much of a difference in the recipe's taste. It will also give you a lot of information about what is good for you to eat while pregnant.
As always, I look forward to reading more about your journey - I'm always here cheering you both on!
I cannot even believe that you have to wait a whole week for beta #2. I think I’d march in there tomorrow and act all incredulous when they say I don’t have an appt. Practice you best blank stare look and say, “really? Are you sure? I thought for sure the nurse said to come back. Well since I’m here we may as well do it, right?”
ReplyDeleteBut that’s me.
Our situations are diff’t, of course, and you probably won’t be going in as often as we did. But your RE should tell you when you’ll graduate from that office to an Ob/Gyn. I remember that Puffer called midwives like 2 days after their bfp and the midwives were already all booked. So if you’re thinking of going that route, you should probably call now.
You are pregnant, girl!
Ditto on 2moms, not because I've been through a m/c, but because after so many BFN's it's going to be totally shocking to hear that I'm pregnant. But you are and it's amazing and you totally deserve it! I can't imagine a better way to welcome in the spring (except that outdoor happy hours will be out for you this summer!)
ReplyDeleteCongrats again! I'm so happy for you! The early stages of pregnancy were stressful after trying for so long. I didn't have any major symptoms so I was constantly googling things like "6 weeks no morning sickness". Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteI found that Baby Center (the website NOT the forums) was my main source of pregnancy information. You can sign up and they will send you weekly e-mails explaining what is going on during each stage of development for you and the baby. There is also a huge database on info on the site.
I completely agree about NOT reading "What to Expect". I've heard it causes insanity.
Just. Wow! I've been reading for a while but not commenting here much (and you have the best blog name EVER)
ReplyDeleteAll pregnancy books drive me crazy so I have none to suggest (my wife read them and told me things on a strict need-to-know basis).
But, as ridiculous as it sounds, you might start checking into prenatal care and birth options now. Some really good docs and midwives fill up FAST (like people must call as soon as they get a positive), especially if there are practices where you know for sure you'll have your own doc or midwife at the birth. It can also take ages to get an appt.
You ARE pregnant! I completely understand the reserve - I'm experiencing the same hesitance. Chris kept reminding me last night (as I was tempering any of my own excitement) don't forget to enjoy this time. If you're only going to carry once..this (most likely) is it. Enjoy!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, wooooohoooooo! You are preggers! (So you're not like, "Who is this chick?" I have commented before under my other Blogger account, the one about that leafy green vegetable that's good for you, but am trying to keep blog-worlds from colliding).
ReplyDeleteFor pregnancy, try to get a copy of I'm Pregnant! A Week-by-Week Guide by Lesley Regan. She's British and the book has way less hysteria than What to Expect and other American pregnancy books. And for comic relief, my wife and I have really been enjoying "The Expectant Father" for snickering about crazy heteros. (Especially the part in month 3 about how it is totally normal to experience deep concern that the baby your partner is carrying isn't yours. Uh...yeah).
For babies, give the Baby Book by William and Martha Sears a shot--they can be a little intimidating, but it is a great, comprehensive reference book if you're interested in attachment parenting.
For prenatal nutrition, do check out Nina Planck's Real Food for Mother and Baby, but take it with a grain of salt. She is all about full-fat dairy, which I really appreciated after What to Expect, but is a little overly dogmatic at times and her pregnancy anecdotes are kind of boring and irrelevant. Still, it is really valuable to have a whole-foods approach to pregnancy nutrition, since most of the pregger books we have are pretty mainstream in that regard.
For OBs, it really depends on your situation. I had assumed my RE would keep me on until 10 weeks, but she actually released me as soon as I had doubling betas, and I've gotten all my prenatal care so far from my OB (I'm almost 10 weeks). If that's the case, try to find an OB who will see you at 6 weeks.
Finally, I will echo the caution to steer CLEAR of the Baby Center discussion boards. If you think What to Expect is bad, the BabyCenter boards are a way more hysterical, unedited version.
Congrats again!!!!!
Congratulations! I've been reading for a while, but never commented. I guess just shyness. Anyway.
ReplyDeleteI completely sympathize with the doubt and fear, and how hard they are to let go. My wife isn't even pregnant yet, but I already strongly suspect that I'm going to be the one who is a little more reserved about it all, at least until we get out of the first trimester. I may, or may not, relax a little then. I'm the sort of person who carries band-aids in my bag, because I know sooner or later I, or someone around me will need them. It's hard not to carry over that mentality.
Anyway, congratulations again, and hopefully you can just enjoy it after you get used to the idea. At least for the most part. :-)
looks like you already have lots of good suggestions, so ill just add one. for pregnancy, i liked The Pregnancy Journal by Harris. its a daily whats-going-on-in-there type book; no assumptions you have a male partner.
ReplyDeletefor name books, we just checked out a stack from the library.
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! I just read the first sentence of this post and couldn't get any further without commenting. CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I am beyond thrilled for you. All the hair on my head is standing on end. THIS RULES!!!
ReplyDeleteOkay, I am off to read the rest of this post, and the 6 previous ones (man, I'm behind, but what fantastic news to catch up on)!
okay, now i'm crying. so, so happy for you.
ReplyDeleteI think you'd like the Our Bodies, Ourselves guide--lots of great advice about midwives & doulas, and they are all about advocacy, which I think you know a thing or two about already, but hey. I've also liked the Mayo Clinic guide.
For baby name books, a friend loaned me The Baby Name Wizard, which I like because it gives charts about a certain name's popularity, and discusses its general vibe. It also has a "if you like the name [whatever], you will probably also like [blah blah], which is more unique" attitude.
Anyway. Congrats again. NOW I am going to read those other 6 posts. xoxo
This is still just the best news of the friggin week. I am so excited for you and Speedy. Even Chefy was really happy to hear the good news. I understand scariness of the beginning. I would just try and keep calm in whatever way you can. I am so thrilled that you've gotten pregnant again so quickly- you're giving us all hope!
ReplyDeleteCome on 3800! I don't have enough experience to recommend any pregnancy books, really. (We have a couple but I just hate them. My mother in law got us WTEWYE and it made me very angry, as did the Mayo Clinic book. Total fearmongering.)
ReplyDeleteI do recommend The Baby Name Wizard. It's different from other baby books in that it sorts the names out by types and gived you possible sibling names and stuff. It's cool.
I also love, love, love Waiting for Birdy, which is really a memoir and not a guide.
Recipes soon, please!
I'm a little late to the party for commenting, but a huge congratulations!! We are so excited and happy for you!
ReplyDeleteA popular book in Australia is Up the Duff by Kaz Cooke - funny but informative and makes a light hearted change to all the heavy going stuff.
ReplyDeleteFor labour and birthing we used Birth Skills by JuJu Sundin. Check out her website - she has a great philosophy, explains the birthing process and has very practical exercises to practise before hand and to take with you during the labour/birth. It also involves the partner - although I have to admit to only really reading it the night before he arrived!